Rain & Gloom

Somedays it is just difficult to get out of bed. The alarm goes off, your eyes grudgingly open, and you realize that even though it is a time of morning when the sun is up, it is not out and shining for you. These are days I dread. The weekend days were beautiful. Sunday morning birds woke me up as they sang outside my window. I arose before the alarm went off and was happy to be awake. 24 hours later it was raining.... AGAIN. Don't get me wrong, I love the rain. I love the way it smells, how everything is clean afterward, and how colors in nature look so much more vivid and true to their chroma. But it has been rainy and gloomy for about 6 weeks straight where I live and it is starting to effect my brain. It is March and that means flowers, trees budding, sunshining, warmer weather and Spring Break. But, alas, so far it has been colder than usual and, as there is no sunshining-ness, nothing is blooming.

I NEED that sense of normalcy to return to my life. I thrive on routine and stability. I am aware that the groundhog saw his shadow and winter will therefore last for roughly 2 more weeks. But, you must understand that I live in a place where normally winter lasts from around 15 December until 15 February, tops. This has been the coldest, wettest winter I can remember and I don't like it. I think I might have Seasonal Affected Disorder because all I want to do is runaway to warmer climes and lie on a beach with a book. I would prefer to runaway to mountains but if I were to runaway to mountains at this time of year I would encounter snow, so the beach sounds warmer. I also have mid-terms this week in 2 classes and I have no desire to go to school. I feel like being totally lazy but I cannot. It is difficult to feel optimistic about school and life in general when the sky is overcast and black-grey clouds loom overhead. And they do loom in a menacing way that just screams, in a deep Darth Vader-like voice, "Stay in your house and read a book that is not required reading for school or you will regret daring to cross your threshold and enter the domain of the elements. Bwah-ha-ha!"

It is times like these that make one doubt the calm sense of peace that has come when decisions have been made that one knows are right. I know that somewhere out there the sun is still brightly shining and the sky is blue. But the storm clouds of adversity make it difficult to remember that. So I shall get out of bed, put on comfy clothes, tennis shoes, go to class, and remember that this too shall pass. Each day brings new adventures, new challenges, and marks off one day closer to achieving my goal of a college degree and a career in a field I enjoy. (Although this week I feel like settling for a job with stable hours and a regular paycheck.) Bring on the rain! I can take it!