Today was one of those days where I woke up tired. Just drained. Took a nap in the morning before I went to work. You know, one of those days.
I had a great session with a patient. Ate some pumpkin pie at my great-aunt's. Drove home anticipating dinner and going back to sleep.
Walked in my door and then I saw it.
An eviction notice was left on a box right in front of my door. Couldn't miss it when I walked in.
I've been struggling financially lately. My savings are gone. I'm barely working what can be considered part-time hours and my checking account is so slim I had to sell the belt that holds up the pants and get a shoelace.
I had been told that this particular bill was being paid by someone last week and then found out in the most stressful way possible that it hadn't been done. Then the person informed me that this situation was my fault as I didn't come to them personally to ask for assistance. But, they're still willing to pay what is required so that I will not be legally forced to live in my car come midnight Friday. (I think I may need to ask God for forgiveness for calling this particular person an a**hole while I was praying earlier tonight.)
"Tomorrow is another day."
"Tomorrow is another day."
After talking to a really close friend for several hours tonight, brainstorming solutions, government assistance programs, etc....we discussed the need to change my "car." She showed me this YouTube video:
I'm pretty sure I'm going to make it but the way I'm getting there needs to change. While I'm waiting for a full-time medical position to open up, other means of acquiring funding are necessary. I have sold everything I have of value--books--with the exception of my computer and my car. Plasma donation brings in $200/month but it isn't enough on top of the $450/month I am making right now to cover rent and the other bills that come with being alive.
"Tomorrow is another day."
In a few hours, my car will be in the shop having the front axle repaired, again. I will be in a loaner vehicle tooling around the city scouting out waitressing jobs. I've never waitressed and I desperately need someone to see me as a confident, happy, gregarious woman instead of a desperately scared woman who's beginning to doubt her own sense of self-worth and ability to achieve greatness in life. And I need the restaurant to be one that's packed every night with people who want to tip their servers. Please, dear Lord!
But, I can't think about that now. I need to think about that tomorrow so that I can sleep tonight.
"Tomorrow is another day."
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PS--I love your comments, but right now I can't see how this is preparing me for any major future blessings and I'm not grateful for what I'm going through. I am grateful that I have had perfect thoughts pop into my head about who I should call or where I should go for the perfect assistance at the exact time I needed a specific person to help me. But....this is pushing me past my ability to cope and my stress levels are maxed out.
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