Will I Ever Be Happy Again?

This weekend the Beaumont Texas Stake of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints had its semi-annual Stake Conference. (A stake is a large group of smaller congregations called wards. It's similar to a diocese in the Catholic lexicon if that helps.) Every six months all the Mormons in the area get together and are taught by church leaders. This weekend we were blessed to have a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, present to teach and uplift us. It was one of the best meetings I have been to in a long time.

*Elder Holland said that as he was flying to Texas, he sat on the plane looking out the window wondering if there would be anyone in the meetings he would speak at that was simply coming because they were hurting and needed hope and comfort. He said he wondered what he could say to that person to help them have hope and receive the comfort they have been praying for. I had been praying for months for exactly what he said tonight and I had felt like my prayers were not being answered. This is a summary of what he said tonight "To the one person coming to conference simply looking for comfort and hope."

When there are days and nights that he seems like you will never be happy again because your life, your marriage, your hopes have all been broken, remember that God loves broken things. He cherishes, reveres, and fixes things that are broken. God can heal everything that is broken. It takes broken clouds to water the ground. It takes broken earth to sow seeds. It takes broken grain to make bread. It takes broken bread to nourish a body. God loves broken things. 

He truly loves a broken heart and a contrite spirit. It is our sacrifice, our offering to Him. It's truly all we have that He has asked of us. Elder Holland reminded us that Christ said that whosoever offers up a broken heart and a contrite spirit, him shall God sanctify with fire. He pointed out that the Savior died of a broken heart. When we complain about the trials we must endure or the pain we must experience remember that the road to salvation merges at times with the road to Calvary. When we offer our broken heart to the Savior, convinced that maybe it can never be healed, He gives it back restored, whole, and perfected.

There are times when you must "Simply square your shoulders, stiffen your spine, and simply endure." Even when it feels like you are headed for a brick wall and can see that everything will be smashed upon that wall and go to pieces, don't bail out. Turn towards your Father in Heaven and the Savior. "While you're turning towards divinity, you're going to find a bit of divinity in you." You are a Child of God. He loves you and wants you to know that you can endure more than you think you can endure. "You're stronger than you think you are. You're tougher than you think you are. You can do things you didn't think you could do."

We become like Christ and develop godliness in us by walking the path that He walked without giving up. Elder Holland issued a warning.

"Don't you DARE raise up like Job's wife and curse God and die. Don't you DARE assume that because you suffer, God doesn't love you." God allowed his only begotten Son to suffer more agony, anguish, misery, and betrayal than you or I will ever be asked to endure and through it ALL, Christ was called by the Father, "My Beloved Son."

Elder Holland concluded his talk by discussing the story recorded in Mark when the Twelve were on the Sea of Galilee and a great storm arose. They went to where the Savior was sleeping and awoke him, asking, "Master, carest thou not that we perish?" The Savior rose, rebuked the wind, rebuked the seas, and then gently rebuked the Apostles: "Why are ye so fearful? How is it that ye have such little faith?"

When life gets difficult and you have those days and the nights seem longer than the days and it feels like the sun will never come up again, it will. The sun does come up in the morning and the Son is the bright and morning star. "Endure and save yourself for days of happiness ahead." ~Virgil
You will be happy again. You have had happiness before. There is nothing that Heavenly Father and the Savior cannot fix if you ask them to fix it. Just stay calm and stay in the boat when the winds blow and the seas rise up like great mountains to crush you. Stay in the boat. Things will be calmer tomorrow. God loves broken things, especially you.

I have been feeling so broken all summer because someone did something that broke something in my life. I have been struggling and not feeling like anyone cared about me. I have been hurting. Tonight, all those tears, all those cries, all the silent pleadings for peace and answers were acknowledged. Every question I had taken to the Lord seeking answers, was answered. I even appreciated the gentle reminder to not bail out, to not quit. Endure just a little longer and all will be well because there is nothing broken so badly that God cannot fix it and return it to you mended and whole.

I love and appreciate the gospel of Jesus Christ. I stand in awe of the miracle that is forgiveness. I am humbled that someone loved me so much that they gave their life for me so that I can return to the presence of my Father in Heaven if I so desire. I know that the fullness of the gospel of Jesus Christ is on the earth today and that men have been called of God to preach His gospel and witness of His teachings just as they did when Christ walked upon the earth. I was privileged to be taught tonight by one such man and it was one of the best learning experiences of my life.

*Note: This post is based on my notes of the meeting. This is NOT an official publication or transcript of Jeffrey R. Holland's discourse. Any errors are mine alone.